What a mighty God we serve, He will never leave us nor forsake us Deut 31:6, Heb 13:5. There is no truer statement than this. In our weaknesses, God’s gracious and powerful strength is manifested 2 Cor 12:9.
The last three years of my life have been hell on earth. I was diagnosed with Grave’s disease, which came with a myriad of problems, too much to go into details in this medium. My physical strength was so stretched to a point where it was difficult for me to participate in normal activities of daily living. My mental health was so severely tested I questioned my place in this world and whether I even had the strength to keep going. This is coming from someone who had lost their sight at a tender age of 16, and was in total darkness, but God kept me going. Someone who had at one time lost the ability to walk and had to be taught to walk again, but God kept me going. Someone who had complete hemiparesis in the right side and had to teach herself to use her non dominant left side, but God kept me going. Someone who had been marked for death by physicians but God says no every single time. Even with having gone through those trying seasons in my life, my mental health was never affected, thus nothing could have prepared me for this battle. I was so trapped in my own mind I literally couldn’t see a way out.
But in the silence of my despair, God whispered to my heart: “You are not alone.”
Even when I couldn’t see Him, He was there. Even when I pushed people away, He sent gentle reminders through the kindness of strangers, the prayers of loved ones, and moments of peace that came out of nowhere. Slowly, I began to realize that my pain was not wasted — that even in my brokenness, God was shaping me for something greater.
It wasn’t an instant transformation. Healing came step by step, with tears, prayers, and days when I felt like giving up. But every time I stumbled, God lifted me. He reminded me that my story was not over. That I was loved. That there was a purpose to my life, even when I couldn’t see it.
It’s such an amazing feeling to know that God has yet again won another battle for me. To be able to resume my studies and to pick up the pieces of my life and rebuild. Knowing that God has prepared me for the next chapter and will keep on re shaping me a day at a time.
To God be the glory I walked into service on Sunday and my laughter and smile for the first time in the last three years wasn’t hiding any pain, both physical and mental. What a wonderful feeling and what a wonderful God we serve. Unto Him all praises are due.
I am writing this not as someone who has it all figured out, because trust me, I don’t, but as someone who has been carried through the fire and come out stronger because of His grace. I share my story because I know what it feels like to believe you’re alone in the fight. And I want to tell you — you are not. What I have learnt over the years is there will be times in your journey where the only companion you will have is the comforter, and that’s more than enough.
You are seen. You are loved. You are never, ever alone.
So if you’re in the middle of your storm, hold on. God is with you, and He will bring you through. He loves you more than you will ever know. He sees your tears and He understands them. He hears your cries and He interprets them. Diamonds are formed deep beneath the earth’s surface under conditions of intense heat and pressure. We are more precious than diamonds, hence I am afraid your refining pressure may come in the form of trials and tribulations. He never promised us an easy care free life. But what He promised is that He will be our rock, our anchor and our foundation, and He will walk with us always. So keep drawing close to God, James 4:8. Your story isn’t finished yet — and the best chapters are still to come. For we walk by faith and not by sight. 2 Cor 5:7.
Written by
Elecia A Buckley
01.10.25
